Gold day

Yesterday, Meyni and I argued. She is rightly worried for herself, her family, her baby. She is large with it, only a few months from due. She thinks it is a girl, but I argued she should not ill-wish herself in such a manner. She replied that she would quite like a girl, thank you my lady, and must I be such an old woman?

It is with no happiness that she admitted that she could hardly send us hence. Not only would Sev be displeased, but she is tied up in it now, and her former profession does not lend her well to confiding in the law. We are all tied to the oars, and where the ship goes, we go. Her mother likes me. That, and her mother’s frailty, tips the balance in my favor. I have won the balance of necessity, and I know she is well and truly afraid of us. Len, her husband, is loyal. Somewhat absurdly, boringly loyal.

Still, I have no wish to be a burden. We pay rent, but perhaps a little extra, for her trouble, some favor. Something a bit more immediate than the future favor of friends of the empire, which is too much for someone – even I – to imagine, not really. I must say, however, that given the play of things with Sev and Dri, I cannot imagine friendship shall be our base state with the imperial house, if this works. Uneasy political alliance, certainly. I have never had very many friends. Losing Min still – aches. Like losing a tooth, as a child. Not pain, exactly, just emptiness.

It bothers me more that I cannot check on the wellbeing of my cook.

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