Fire day

This morning, at random, Min said, “You were very cheerful, two days gone.”

I smiled and replied, “It was a party, dear Lady Jai.”

“Quite a party,” she replied, expression curious. I cannot say what she was thinking.

I changed the subject to the children’s riding, because I could not stand to talk longer on it and pretend that it was normal.

It is normal.

I hate… life. The city. The nobility. The wars. The weather. Everything.

So casually a man’s life ends. Even here, now, I do not dare write his name. The names of those who never existed, after all, do not exist.

Damn it all.

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